A big decision…..but here goes…
I’ve taken the big decision to let everyone know something very personal about me. I’ve been thinking about it for a long time, and how indeed I would go about it, but I do believe this is the right thing to do and is my own decision.
About 10 years ago I had my first symptoms, then in 2005 I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. It’s most common in Scotland and in girls for some reason, and the cause is still unknown. It affects different people in different ways and my first symptom was Optic Neuritis where parts of my field of vision were missing. With my kind of MS (relapsing remitting) I have a relapse which normally lasts about 6-8 weeks, then it goes away. This happens about 3 or 4 times a year. Other relapses have involved severe numbness in my arms and legs, like my arm feels like I’ve been sleeping on it. I also get seriously bad fatigue where I am overwhelmingly tired, and I’ll never forget the Foo Fighters tour where I fell asleep the minute I got in the van every day – so was the brunt of many jokes! I also get very dizzy a lot and have dodgy balance, so not great at carrying drinks (not a good person to get a round in!). There’s also many other things, but those are the main problems for me. There may come a time where relapses happen then don’t go away. My eyes have never quite gone back to normal after one 2 years ago. I annoyingly didn’t take out critical illness cover on my mortgage when I got it in 1999, and if I had it would have been paid off. Very sad.
I’ve not kept this a secret because I’m embarrassed by it; I just didn’t feel ready for letting everyone know as I found it hard to deal with myself. I had a half page article in a newspaper revealing that I worked in a call centre for a few months, so I wasn’t ready for any potentially bad press I’d need to deal with. I only told people very close to me about it, and appreciate so, so much the decency and respect they had by keeping it to themselves.
I take an injection called Avonex once a week which is to slow relapses down by 30%. I’ve to get a scan within the next month to see if things have got worse and they would put me on a stronger drug called Tysabri if necessary. There’s no cure for MS yet, so any help is worth it. The needle is massive as it’s to reach the muscle in my thigh, so pretty gross and again took a lot of getting used to. Side effects are like having the flu which is yucky, but this goes away overnight with paracetamol.
I suppose I also wanted to let everyone know about this as it will only be a matter of time where a problem would be quite visible. I’m lucky where I work for myself so can deal with it best I can, and takes naps when needed. Numbness makes typing and writing hard, and my parents have been an enormous help with my badge company when necessary. It won’t stop me making music or doing gigs for a long, long time I hope, so my voice will be around to bug people for ages I’m afraid! I don’t know what anyone will make of this news, but I feel a giant sense of relief in getting a decade of something serious off my chest. Thank you for being there to talk to!
Wow – well done you for being brave enough to share. I’m sure other people suffering similar symptoms will appreciate someone in a high profile position talking about it, and only by talking about the various illnesses and diseases that affect so many of us can we ever make others be accepting of them.
You sound like you have a great attitude about the whole thing, and that’s very inspiring indeed.
PS – hurrah to your voice being around “to bug people for ages”!!!!
Just read your post. I am so sorry and shocked to read this news.
I can’t imagine how difficult it must have been these last few years not being able to speak publicly about this. I’m sure you have made the right decision today though.
You clearly have incredible, supportive friends and family and a great attitude to get you through the bad times.
We’ll all be thinking of you this next month.
All good wishes
G
It’s very brave of you to say this so publicly and I have huge respect for you doing so. You’ve been a hero of mine for many years and you will continue to be for many more. Billy xx
It’s very brave of you to open up about this; hope everything goes well this month and thereafter.
Take care,
Gary xx
I’m so shocked to hear this. I was diagnosed with progressive MS two years ago and am coping surprisingly well – a positive mental attitude and a good sense of humour are key
I’m sure you know how much support is out there – family, friends, fans and the NHS (physiotherapy is great!) and there’s more research going on than ever before.
Take care and be positive
A
xxx
Amanda, there’s nothing to be ashamed about. You’re not letting this effect who and what you are. You’re fighting and you’re going to keep doing the things that make you happy, so don’t ever feel ashamed for admitting something like this. You have the unwavering support of all of your fans, without a doubt. You’re a strong woman. A brave woman. Thank you for sharing something very personal. Be well.
With love,
Kendall
p.s. – See you on Facebook.
Manda,
You are such a strong amazing woman!! It must have been so difficult keeping this inside so long. I respect your decision to let us in on this part of your life. I hope that you will be able to make music for many years to come. You are truly an inspiration and capable of absolutely anything!! I wish you all the best with everything.
Take care,
Chrissy
Bless you for posting this, and for sharing with us. I can’t imagine it was an easy thing to do, but clearly you’re a woman who’s used to braving difficult circumstances and choices… and making such fun music while you’re at it! Keep on keeping on.
I’m not good with words but wanted to say something. I’m sorry and sad to hear about your MS. I can’t even begin to imagine how difficult it must have been for you to let everyone know about it but I think that its extremely brave of you and truly inspirational. You are my absolute hero and I love you even more for being able to share something like that. Like the people before me have said, your a very strong and amazing woman and seem to be coping really well. Your family and friends must be incredibly supportive. You will continue to be my favourite artist and I cant wait to hear more of your music! Good luck with everything in the future =) xxx
Love you Manda, stay strong and brave sweetie.
Oh, Amanda… what a horrible, horrible thing to have been dealing with for so long. I’m so sorry – and glad that you’ve got such a great attitude to it.
To share it is such an utterly courageous thing to do – but then again I’d expect nothing less from you: you’ve always had such strength.
Going public is absolutely the right thing, too… you’ll be an inspiration to so many and, who knows, maybe raise some awareness about what the condition really involves.
Jo, the kids and I send all our love. If there’s ever any way we can help with anything, just give us a shout.
As one of my favorite artist on the planet, I’m sorry to hear this news. It’s sucks. But human beings are survivors and I can tell how much you like to make music and I know you won’t let this stop you one bit. We’re cheering you on! (^_^)v
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Big fan, really sorry to hear this, but glad you feel to share it!
all the best